5 Ingredients for a Contented Life

If you're anything like me, you would have clicked through to this post looking for some easy answers. I'm pretty sure that every day I read some article promising happiness in a few short steps. I think I have tried most types of therapies, spiritual practices and philosophies and yet still haven't mastered the art of sustained  happiness (and by sustained, I mean longer than say, my menstrual cycle).

That being said, along the way, I have picked up a few nuggets of wisdom that I will graciously share with you. 

Here are my 5 ingredients for a contented life;

1. Peanut butter cake & forgiveness

"Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness." Marianne Williamson.

Learning how to forgive has to be my number one step for contentment. From the day you are born till the day you leave this earth, you will have cause to forgive someone. But even more than that, forgiving yourself is crucial. A wise friend once encouraged me to be kind to myself and to treat myself the way I treat others. That was a life changing moment for me and something I could go on about forever. Say nice things to, & about yourself, no matter what you've said or done or what anyone thinks of you. 

Forgiving yourself may be a new concept for you, as making peanut butter cake was for me. Providing you don't have a nut allergy, this cake is delicious and moist and a new favourite. Click here for the recipe link. 

2. Chocolate buttercream & gratitude

"Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognise how good things really are." Marianne Williamson

It's almost a cliche to speak about gratitude so I'll share 3 (of the many) things I'm grateful for;

1. Life. In January I lost my nephew (aged 12 months) & my great grandmother (aged 93 years). I am grateful for my life and my health. 

2. My children. I'm blessed to have two healthy beautiful boys that fill my heart. I am also an Aunty to many more beautiful souls that I get to see and love on regularly.

3. My access to knowledge. I love to learn and I'm so fortunate to be able to feed my insatiable appetite with the many types of learning that are within my grasp. 

With that in mind, I'm always on the look out for new chocolate recipes & I found another Joy the Baker special with her chocolate buttercream recipe (link here). It's literally everything. 

3. Chocolate Fudge & the dirty word 'should'

Should is my least favourite word. In fact, I find it offensive. Should is the cause of resentments, anxieties, disappointments, arguments, the list goes on. "I should have achieved x by the time I turned 30", "She should be like y." "He should do z." All rubbish. Do yourself a favour, banish the word and make chocolate fudge. Trust me. 

4. Golden Meringues & focus

"We can always choose to perceive things differently. You can focus on what's wrong in your life, or you can focus on what's right." Marianne Williamson

Have some fun & change your focus. I'm not talking about avoidance because we have to feel what we feel. But staying in your funk is not the way. Do something that breaks the cycle of negative self talk, this weekend I made cookies with my nieces & nephews. It was hectic & exhausting & it made me smile. Watch comedies or hang out with friends or paint meringues with golden glitter. It's not the answer to your problems but it will give you some welcome respite whilst you wait for time to heal. 

5. Ferrero Rochers & giving back 

A note I received at work this week :)

"We are not held back by the love we didn't receive in the past, but by the love we're not extending in the present." Marianne Williamson

Last but by no means least, do something for someone else. It doesn't have to be something big; a smile, a compliment, a cake topped with Ferrero Rochers. You get so much more by giving than receiving and you never know what people are going through. I've practically bought the affection of my niece with this cake, it was a small price to pay!

So there it is, sugar and contentment in 5 steps. Don't say I don't give you anything :)

Peace & Love

Xxx

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Birthdays And Bows....

Rashonye!

Today is the birthday of my beautiful sister, Rashida, Rashonye, Rae!!!

Here are 10 things you need to know about my sister. 

1. She's my oldest & most trusted confidante, I used to make her squirm with all of my teenage secrets, (things are even worse these days!)

Old school us!

2. Back in the days, when there was stalemate in my flat over who would clean the kitchen and there wasn't a single clean dish, my sister would come and wash up the dishes and tidy up to make my life bearable.

Rashonye, DJ & Ellie

3. When my son was born, my sister took about 6 months (maybe more) after graduating to look after him for me because I wasn't ready to send him to nursery. 

My sis & Bailey

4. I've lost count of the number of times my sister has helped me complete cake orders. Usually, I'm too (proud, disorganised, deluded about my capabilities) to ask in advance. She doesn't ask, she just rolls her sleeves up and gets involved.

5. She never takes any credit for any input or involvement with anything I do. Instead, she sings my praises and celebrates my work.

Chocolate fans, Ferrero Rocher and glitter

6. Rashida is an incredible cook, the OG chef in the family. Whenever I'm going through one of my ever frequent loss of appetite/skinny phases, her food is the only thing that I can eat and have seconds of.

Living life like it's golden

7. She's gotten me out of a tricky situation a ridiculous number of times. Two favourites are the time I missed my train home from Paris and she wired money across so that I could catch the next one. Or the time she paid my hotel bill when I had a problem with my debit card.

Cake fit for a beautiful person

8. She knows me better than myself. To be fair it's borderline witchcraft. She can verbalise what I'm feeling without me having to say a single word, (like I said, it's witchery!!!!!)

African Queen

9. Aside from being beautiful, she is INCREDIBLY talented. She can play the guitar, sing, cook, bake, dance, sew, paint, draw, play sports, teach, entertain, do hair, the list goes on and on and on.

Sister vibes!

10. I love her because she's awesome.

Happy Birthday Sis

Peace & Love

xx

(p.s. The cake is a chocolate sponge sandwiched together with vanilla buttercream and chocolate fudge frosting. It's then covered with chocolate fans and Ferrero Rochers.)

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